Did Someone Just Tell Me I Rock?

Every year the same thing happens right around this time. I face a barrage of "Happy Mother's Day" commercials, cards, store advertisements, and people all telling me to have a HMD. Here is the latest one:

My absolutely favorite resturant, "Here's coupon to eat free!". Oh, but gosh darn there's a hook and a I don't qualify.

But, this year I'm okay with it. And I want the rest of you to be okay with it too. Many of you are participating in our OMG You Rock Day experience. (Which is flippin' awesome by the way!) Some of you may have no idea what I'm talking about which is fine, you are more than welcome to familiarize yourself with the concept, just click on the link at my badge on the right. Even if you haven't participated in the gift exchange, you can still participate in making it a good day, I'll explain in a sec.

First, we have to take care of your heart. There is no doubt that as this day approaches you can't help but be reminded that everyone else is a mother and you are not. And this is a hard thing to face when you have gone through so many trials, hoops, draining of your savings, and heartache for the ability to "belong" on Mother's Day. Whenever you go to a restaurant, or church that day because you are a woman and you are not a child somebody is going to tell you, "HMD" and it can sting.

Or perhaps it's painful for other reasons. Maybe you do have a child that you are so grateful for, but you desire is to give that child a sibling and have suffered through secondary infertility. Or it could be that you have your family, but you have lost your mother so the day reminds you of that heartache. All in all, it can be a difficult day for many when strangers walk up to you and say, HMD! As if all is right in the world.

Here's what I want you to do when this happens. While the person is telling you HMD...in your mind replace that with OMG You Rock! That way it becomes much easier to say, "Hey Thanks!". Who cares if you give a stranger the wrong impression that you aren't a mother. I want everyone to think of me...(oh, here were go... do I have an ego or WHAT?!) saying directly to you, that You Rock. If while at church someone who doesn't know what you are going through just happens to give you a hug because of the occasion, I want you to think it's me giving you a hug. Our minds are pretty powerful and we can take advantage of that for the occasion to help get through a difficult day. Practice this enough and you might stop yourself to say, "Did I just hear that correctly? How did they know about OMG You Rock Day? In fact I have done this already with that email I received, I checked it again and now it looks like this..


Oh, and if you are a friend of an infertile, and not sure what you can do, here's a suggestion. Just approach them either in person or via email with this, "I know that this is a tough day for you. You have gone through a lot and yet you have to be reminded of a goal yet unfulfilled. I just want you to know that I'm thinking of you, that you are such a great person and I am so happy to know you."

Now, on to the second item. Even if you may have missed the deadline on our gift and card exchange you can still participate in the day. On May 10th, we will all get together in The Stirrup Queen Ballroom. There will be an open discussion and chat where we can all help each other get through the day. There is no particular time, although I expect the heaviest traffic will be in the afternoon.

So, carry on my dears. Remember what to do when you are being hit with the dreaded HMD, what your really hearing is, OMG You Rock!